In
a break from the normal Posts, this is the first of an occasional Guest Posts.
Today's Post has been written by Rich Foole, Lead Editorial Writer for the
popular right leaning Daily Wail newspaper.
We do not believe the explanations about these Jellyfish by TV wildlife presenter, Steve Backshall, published recently on Twitter. Yet again it proves you should not believe what you read on social media (apart from the Daily Wail tweets, of course). The article was desperately published by The Guardian, but clearly it can't be treated seriously.
Coastal
house prices are set to free fall as swarms of Killer Jellyfish invade
the coastline. These Jellyfish have been arriving all along the Southern coastlines over the last few
months. None of the Jellyfish have
been found in possession of a UK passport and all are believed to be
illegal immigrants. They appear in the night time and are making
it difficult for our readers, especially the dog walkers &
beach-lovers, to enjoy the beaches. Many of our readers are too scared
to walk their dogs on the beaches, fearful that these Jellyfish will
suddenly jump up and maul their dogs.
Barrel Jellyfish: This looks very fat, perhaps it has already fed on a small dog. South Haven, Studland (9 July)
Budget cuts have meant the Border Force have been caught out as these Killer Jellyfish continue to
arrive. A spokesman for the Border Force admitted off the record, we
blame it on the problems in the Mediterranean, especially in Libya. The
European Mediterranean countries should be doing more to stop them
appearing in the Med. Once they get out of the Med, they are quickly
arriving in areas like Calais. Here the French are encouraging them to
leave French waters & make the short crossing to the British
beaches.
Barrel Jellyfish: Not looking at it's best. South Haven, Studland (9 July)
The UKIQP leader, Mr Farfetched, was quick to call for the EU to pay for all the Jellyfish to be returned to Europe. He said this would not happen if the government had listened to him & built a wall all along our territorial water borders. It worked for Hadrian 1900 years ago & it could work for the UK again today.
Barrel Jellyfish: Note, the killer tentacles stretching out towards our intrepid cameraman. South Haven, Studland (9 July)
With no let up to
their arrival in sight, the Daily Wail believes it won't be long before coastal house
prices are in free fall. This wouldn't have happened if Mrs Thatcher was
still running the government, instead of the left wing puppet, David Camerbert.
We do not believe the explanations about these Jellyfish by TV wildlife presenter, Steve Backshall, published recently on Twitter. Yet again it proves you should not believe what you read on social media (apart from the Daily Wail tweets, of course). The article was desperately published by The Guardian, but clearly it can't be treated seriously.